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February 2010 eNewsletter

Valentine's Day for Singles

Valentine's Day is a time to celebrate love, so why do so many people dread and even hate the holiday? Although the sight of flowers, stuffed bears, and candy hearts often stirs warm feelings of admiration, affection and infatuation for those in a loving relationship, it can evoke feelings of loneliness and self-doubt for singles. So how do you enjoy, or at least endure, the day if you're flying solo? Here are some helpful suggestions.

  1. Express gratitude.
    Valentine's Day is a time to show your love to anyone you are close to, not just a romantic partner. Spend time with friends, siblings, parents, grandparents or teachers. Give thanks for those who have made a difference in your life, and tell them that you care.
  2. Get connected.
    Write down a list of the people you have not talked to in a while and have wanted to call. Then, call them one by one. They will be thrilled to hear an old, familiar voice.
  3. Pamper yourself.
    Give yourself a treat by doing something you don't usually do. Go to the spa, take a luxurious bath, have a movie marathon, cook a gourmet dinner or read a good book.
  4. Go out with friends.
    Go to dinner, grab some cocktails or play cards. You could also throw a "singles party" or an "anti-Valentine's Day party" at your house.
  5. Serve others.
    Spread a little love and cheer by doing some charity work. Volunteer at a shelter, visit an orphanage or hospital, serve food at a soup kitchen, or socialize with the elderly in a nursing home.
  6. Adopt a pet.
    A pet can help you cope with loneliness because you will have a friend to talk to and care for. Dogs and cats, in particular, get along well with humans and reciprocate love with shows of affection.
  7. Offer to babysit.
    On Valentine's Day, babysitters are usually in high demand. You will be doing a friend or family member a favor and will have someone to spend time with. Plus, children are fun and playful. Their antics will take your mind off Valentine's Day in no time.
  8. Travel.
    You don't have anything holding you back, so take a trip to a place you have always wanted to visit. You will enjoy yourself and meet new people.
  9. Make a relationship plan.
    If you are looking for a relationship, brainstorm ways to meet other singles. Make a list of things you can do to improve yourself.
  10. Stay positive.
    Don't define yourself by your relationship status. Instead of sulking all day, celebrate the things you are thankful for and the accomplishments you are proud of.
Thus, when Valentine's Day rolls around, don't wallow in self-pity. Instead, keep yourself busy. Love is not just for couples; it's for all of us. So, whether or not you are in a relationship, celebrate Valentine's Day by loving yourself and the people in your life. 
 

Famous First Ladies

With Washington's Birthday, commonly known as Presidents Day, arriving on February 15, it is important to pay tribute to past and present leaders of our country. In doing so, we should not overlook the first ladies. Although their positions are unofficial, many have played an active role in policy-making and have devoted their time to humanitarian and charitable work, all while managing family life and supporting their husbands. It is important, therefore, to recognize their accomplishments, as well. Read on to learn more about five of the country's most notable first ladies.

Abigail Adams (first lady from 1797-1801)
Although Abigail lacked a formal education, she avidly read any book at hand. Her curiosity and intelligence attracted the attention of Harvard graduate, John Adams, and they were soon married. The couple developed a close bond of both the heart and mind. In fact, he often turned to her for advice on political matters, which was rare at the time. Mrs. Adams used her influence to advocate women's rights. In fact, when her husband attended the Continental Congress in Philadelphia, she wrote to him, "Remember the ladies. And be more generous?to them than your ancestors [were]."

Dolly Madison (first lady from 1809-1817)
Before her husband, James Madison, became president in 1809, Mrs. Madison often acted as first lady to President Thomas Jefferson, whose wife passed away before he was elected. Her elegance and charm won her fame and popularity even before her husband was elected president. Mrs. Madison is also known for having rescued valuables from the White House during the War of 1812. Just hours before the British arrived to burn the building, she helped save a famous portrait of George Washington. Mrs. Madison refused to leave until the painting was safe.

 Eleanor Roosevelt (first lady from 1933-1945)
 Eleanor Roosevelt, known as the "First Lady of the World," helped the American people confront the many challenges that arose during her husband's presidency. While Franklin D. Roosevelt was in office, America experienced the effects of the Great Depression and World War II. During this time, Mrs. Roosevelt traveled throughout the country to raise awareness about the needs of the poor and oppressed. After her husband's death in 1945, Harry S. Truman, the new president, selected her to represent the U.S. at the United Nations. There, she helped create a global bill of human rights that advocated liberty and justice for all.

Jacqueline Kennedy (first lady from 1961-1963)
Jacqueline Kennedy worked as a newspaper photographer before her husband, John F. Kennedy, became president. Her passion for the arts transformed the White House into a residence of elegance and charm. It also inspired the American people to appreciate culture and artistic beauty. When her husband was assassinated in November 1963, she handled the tragedy with courage and grace and became a symbol of strength around the world.

Hillary Rodham Clinton (first lady from 1993-2001)
 Before she became first lady, Hillary Clinton was a lawyer and businesswoman. In 2001, she became a U.S. Senator from New York and the first former first lady elected to public office. In 2008, she ran a historic campaign to become president. She now serves as U.S. Secretary of State. In this position, she manages U.S. relations with other governments.

Our current first lady deserves mention, as well. In January 2009, Michelle Obama became the first African-American first lady in U.S. history. Before her husband, Barack Obama, became president, Mrs. Obama worked at a top law firm in Chicago, Illinois. She was also active in her community and helped found Public Allies Chicago, a group that provides leadership training for youth seeking careers in public service.

Since the founding of the presidency in 1789, the role of the first lady has evolved from hostess and fashion trendsetter to influential political figure. Although the job comes with no official duties and no paycheck, it offers limitless possibilities. In this high-profile position, many women have seized the opportunity to make a difference in the world and have become timeless role models for American women.

Boost Your Brain Power

Ever walk into a room and forget what you came for? Ever blank on someone's name in the middle of a conversation? If so, then you are not alone. According to Dr. Gary Small, director of the UCLA Center on Aging, research shows that memory and mental sharpness begin to decline in the early thirties. Most people realize a change in their forties or fifties. The good news, however, is that recent studies have shown that lifestyle changes can thicken parts of the brain, strengthening connections and improving brain functions. Check out some of these ways to keep your brain in tip-top shape.
 
Consume Omega-3s.
 Research suggests that Omega-3s boost brain power. They not only help the circulation system pump oxygen to the brain, they also improve the functioning of membranes that surround brain cells. Omega-3s are even being added to baby formulas because scientists have found that essential fatty acids are necessary for proper brain development in children.

Foods such as walnuts, flaxseed and fish are rich in Omega-3s. Research shows that the positive effects of eating more of these foods appear within a few months. Although the exact amount needed has not been established, aim to eat at least three servings a week of fish such as salmon, sardines, mackerel and tuna. Fish-oil supplements, which are free of mercury and other poisons, are a good alternative, according to Consumerlabs.com. You can also try cooking with walnut oil or sprinkling ground flaxseeds on salad or cereal. Be aware that flaxseed oil has been linked to prostrate cancer, but the seeds, themselves, are considered safe.

Avoid "bad" fats.
 Saturated and trans fats reduce the flow of oxygen-rich blood to the brain. They might also slow the metabolism of glucose, a sugar that fuels brain cells. In a study conducted at the University of Toronto, researchers put rats on a 40-percent-fat diet. The rats experienced decline in memory, spatial awareness and rule learning. Diets high in saturated fats exacerbated the problems. It is OK for fat to constitute up to 30 percent of daily calories, but most fat should come from the aforementioned foods with Omega-3s. Avoid hydrogenated oils, which are often found in fried food, fast food and snack food.

  Take a brain break.
  The abundance of technological innovations has fueled the practice of multitasking, but according to Dr. Orli Etingin, founder and medical director of the Iris Cantor Women's Health Center in New York City, it is important to take at least 45 minutes a day to give your brain a break. This time will rejuvenate your mind and boost mental functioning.
 
Taking time to relax will also reduce stress. According to scientists at the University of California, Irvine, even short bouts of stress cause the body to release hormones that disrupt information processing and storage.

Get enough sleep.
Researchers in Singapore recently found that brains experienced periodic "power failures" after just one night of sleep deprivation. The effects are cumulative, as well. The more nights you skimp on sleep, the more prone you will be to mental lapses and mistakes. Furthermore, studies have shown that memories are solidified during sleep, so don't miss out on this critical period of rest.

Stay active.
Those iron-pumping "meatheads" are growing more than muscles. Research shows that the regions of the brain tied to memory are physically larger in those who exercise regularly than in those who do not. Exercise improves circulation, delivering more oxygen to the brain. According to Dr. Small, this exerts a stronger protective effect on the brain than diet, mental stimulation or any other brain boosting strategy.

Furthermore, in a study at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies in La Jolla, California, scientists found that adult mice that ran on a wheel gained twice as many cells in the hippocampus, an area of the brain involved in learning and memory, than mice that were denied access to the wheel. Another study, conducted at Rhode Island College on 18- to 27-year-olds, demonstrated that 30 minutes of aerobic exercise increased creativity, measured in part by storytelling ability and articulateness. The boost occurred immediately after exercise but was still in effect two hours later.

Consume alcohol in moderation.
 In a study of 3,500 Japanese men, those who drank about one alcoholic beverage per day experienced better cognitive functioning at an older age. Anything beyond that level, however, resulted in a decline in memory and reaction time. Similarly, research conducted on rats found that after consuming large amounts of alcohol, the rats had fewer new cells in the hippocampus region immediately after the binge and close to no new cells in the region a month later. This suggests that the alcohol not only damaged the rats' brains, it prevented repairs.

Try something new.
 Researchers say anything that challenges the brain in a new way can sharpen the mind. This could include learning a different language, traveling to a new place, or adopting a new hobby. It could also include something as simple as brushing your teeth with your non dominant hand, showering with your eyes closed, or looking up new words. Brain scans show that any change in routine activates different circuits and strengthens connections between cells.

Furthermore, in a study conducted at the Rush Alzheimer's Disease Center in Chicago, elderly people who continually challenged their minds had a 33 percent lower risk of developing Alzheimer's disease in the following four years than those who did not engage in such mental exercise; they also had 60 percent less overall memory decline.

Thus, by implementing the techniques listed above, you can slow the inevitable decline of mental capabilities. You might not transform into a genius overnight, but you can expect to see improvements in memory and cognition. Perhaps, you will even locate those car keys you misplaced.

Keep Your Spirits Up When Temperatures Drop

It's easy to feel blue when you can't see any in the sky. With ice crystals coating your hair and winter air nipping at your rosy cheeks, you scrape the snow from your car's windshield, wishing you were on a beach in Bermuda. It can be difficult to maintain a positive attitude in the winter months, but if you can manage to do it, your health and well being will benefit.
 
Analysis of 99 Harvard graduates demonstrated a strong correlation between optimistic thinking in college and good health at the age of 40 and above. Furthermore, according to an American Psychological Association (APA) news release, there is a link between positive emotions and the onset of frailty. Research conducted on 1,558 initially non-frail Mexican Americans living in five southwestern states demonstrated that people who scored high on positive affect or positive thinking were significantly less likely to become frail. In this study, frailty was assessed by measuring weight loss, exhaustion, walking speed and grip strength.

Furthermore, in his book, A Primer in Positive Psychology, Dr. Christopher Petersen says, "Optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to perseverance and effective problem solving; to academic, athletic, military, occupational, and political success; to popularity; to good health; and even to long life and freedom from trauma."

In the winter, we could all use some reminders about how to stay positive. Check out the suggestions below.

  • Make a choice.
     Your thoughts are under your control. When you catch yourself thinking a pessimistic thought, evaluate the facts of the situation and think of a positive alternative. Look for reasons to feel happy and hopeful every day.
  • Monitor sugar intake.
       Although it might be more tempting to shovel Christmas cookies into your mouth than snow off your driveway, limit your consumption of these tasty treats. According to Kathleen DesMaisons, author of Potatoes Not Prozac, sugar and white-flour products affect the same biochemical systems in your body as drugs like heroin. The addiction operates on a cellular level and can affect how you feel.
  • Consume Omega-3s.
       Leading physicians at Harvard Medical School have confirmed that Omega-3s have a positive effect on emotional health. Salmon, flax seeds and walnuts are all excellent sources of Omega-3 fatty acids.
  • Serve others.
       Look for opportunities to help others and volunteer your time. According to Dr. Dan Baker, director of the Life Enhancement Program at Canyon Ranch, a sense of purpose and acts of altruism are strong antidotes to depression.
  • Exercise.
       Don't let the cold weather keep you from breaking a sweat. Instead of exercising outdoors, consider joining a gym. In a 2000 study conducted on 3,403 Finnish adults, researchers found that individuals who exercised 2-3 times per week reported significantly less depression, stress, anger and cynical distrust than non-exercisers.
  • Go outside.
       Although it might require a personal pep talk to trudge out into the slushy tundra, it will be well worth it. Even on cloudy and overcast days, you will be exposed to some sunlight. Go outside midday to ensure that your skin soaks up the Vitamin D in the sun's rays. It will boost your limbic system, the emotional center of the brain.
  • Fly south.
       Plan your yearly vacation for the middle of winter. It will give you something to look forward to and provide a respite from the cold temperatures.
  • Get involved.
       Get together with friends often and stay involved in the events of their lives. When you are feeling down, they will be more willing to offer support and encouragement. Also, start a home project or take up a new hobby. Do anything you can to provide yourself with a sense of accomplishment and to keep your mind occupied.
Even if you are predisposed to negative thinking because of genetics or your childhood experiences, you can learn to restructure your thinking and to focus your energy on positive thoughts. Sometimes, however, a simple case of the "winter blues" can develop into a more serious condition. Feelings of depression, lethargy and fatigue might indicate Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a type of depression that often requires medical attention. Common treatments include light therapy, antidepressants and psychotherapy. See a doctor if you have concerns about SAD.

Be aware, though, that most people experience some degree of emotional instability in the winter. It is common to develop some cabin fever, to sleep and eat more than usual, and to feel less cheerful than in the summer. By following the suggestions listed above, you can strive to achieve a sunnier disposition, even when the sun, itself, is nowhere to be found.